Little Black Socks

Fashion-forward I am not. I would love to claim the title of ‘fashionista’ but unfortunately, for me, my sister got the fashion sense in the family. You would think my sense of style would have benefited over the years but she is also pathologically unable to say anything that might hurt someone’s feelings so basically everything I would try on for her looked ‘cute’…so benefit me, it did not. Continue reading “Little Black Socks”

My Paraplegic Self – Because It Wasn’t A Dream

For months after my injury I woke up every day hoping that it was all just a bad dream. There was always a brief moment of hope and possibility before reality hit yet again. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt that way; it’s been a long time since the fog of disbelief lifted. However some days I still wake up with that familiar feeling of ‘maybe it was just a dream’. Continue reading “My Paraplegic Self – Because It Wasn’t A Dream”

Just You, Me And My Wheelchair

Call me a dreamer, but I had always imagined that my marriage would consist of just the two of us until forever. So I have been somewhat unwilling to accept that our party of two has become a party of three. I’m not talking children…they are our family (and they take our number much higher than three). I’m talking only about our ‘one-on-one-just-you-and-me-until-death-do-us-part’ marriage. You know the one right? Continue reading “Just You, Me And My Wheelchair”

Why We Need A ‘Village’

“It takes a village to raise a child.” A phrase I’m sure most of us are familiar with. I had never really bought in to the whole ‘village’ concept. I was confident that I could raise my children on my own and we didn’t need anyone else except our little family unit. We had grandparents around who loved to babysit and be involved but I considered it a perk more than a necessity. I kept my kids pretty close and while we did have friends around, I didn’t see a need for their help with raising my children. Continue reading “Why We Need A ‘Village’”

My Shoes Are Never Dirty (and other ‘para-perks’)

In this world that takes so much and doesn’t usually give us anything in return, we have to advocate for our own happiness; we have to find and invest our time in the things that make our life worth living. I feel like I advocate for myself most days…other days I take the opposite approach but we all have our weak moments right? While being positive and choosing to live my life isn’t always easy, it does feel like my only option. Continue reading “My Shoes Are Never Dirty (and other ‘para-perks’)”

Don’t Take My Accessibility

Before this spinal cord injury swept in to inflict havoc upon my life I would have to admit that I was uninformed. Well, saying that I was oblivious to the struggles of the disabled population would be putting it nicely. More accurately, I was content to be blissfully ignorant about disability in general. It made me uncomfortable and for that I am ashamed. However now that I have been thrust in to this new reality I have come to learn first hand about the day-to-day difficulties that people with disabilities face. A lot of these struggles are out of my control; a lot of the struggles are things I must learn to manage. But there are some things that I come across that, while still out of my control, leave me frustrated with those of the non-disabled variety. Let me enlighten you. Continue reading “Don’t Take My Accessibility”

My Adventures In Adapted Driving

Driving isn’t for everyone but I always knew it was for me. Growing up I was just aching for the age when I could finally get my license (so were most people that I knew). I was 16 and it was exciting and liberating; it was freedom! Eventually, this huge milestone that I’d waited years for came and went. The excitement diminished and the independence became ordinary. Continue reading “My Adventures In Adapted Driving”

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Perspective Is Everything

Gaining perspective is an incredibly ruthless business. A simple test of perspective would be looking at the photo above…a wheelchair, a woman and a woman in a wheelchair. Does your point of view of the wheelchair change when you see the woman in it? Or do your ideas of the woman change when you see her in the wheelchair? Recently, in a conversation with a friend, I told her that my accident has given me a lot of perspective…on raising kids, marriage, the world and all types of relationships. Her response to that was to say that she had zero desire to go through what I went through in order get that perspective. (Yeah…me too!) The entire process of looking at our past with the knowledge of our present can be quite painful sometimes. It can feel like we were selfish, spoiled or completely stupid. But I’ve been thinking about how viewpoints can be changed and if there is any way to achieve it without going through something significant; something traumatic. Continue reading “Perspective Is Everything”

A Crack In My Motherhood

Like every mother, I grew in to my role as ‘Mommy’. It’s a role every one of us plays differently and most days it would be a hell of a lot easier if it were scripted. But whether we are handed a tiny newborn, taking the hand of a skeptical toddler or welcoming a child or teen into our life, we all become ‘Mom’ pretty quickly after meeting our children. Thankfully we don’t need to know everything right away. We learn and develop as our children do and there is a comforting feeling, a feeling of home, in our own little family’s routines, expectations and traditions. It becomes natural, automatic, familiar and ‘ours. It becomes our motherhood; it becomes our children’s childhood. Continue reading “A Crack In My Motherhood”

A Short Little Love Story

I fell in love when I was 15; I fell in love on Valentine’s Day 2003. It was a Friday. We had been dating for four months and he put a teddy bear in my locker. Still being too young to drive, my mom picked us up from school to go back to my house and we stopped by his house so he could get the roses his mom had picked up for him to give me…I told you we were young. Continue reading “A Short Little Love Story”