Do you feel well represented in the media? I did for the first 28 years of my life. Yes, the Caucasian, heterosexual, able-bodied female demographic isn’t usually ignored. But when I added disabled to the description, my representation all but disappeared from the airwaves. The lack of diversity in the media is an ongoing issue that I became well aware of after I traded my legs in for wheels. However last week, two posts appeared on my social media feeds—one local and one viral—that really got me thinking. Continue reading “It’s Time to Represent Everyone—A Paraplegic’s Perspective on Successfully Integrating Diversity in the Media”
Author: Codi Darnell
Want to fly to Calgary with Megan and I on January 4 for the day or maybe overnight? To go wedding dress shopping with Jenny.
I had to read the text message twice to fully compute what my mother-in-law was asking me. Was she crazy? Did she really think I was going to get on an airplane with her and my sister-in-law to an unfamiliar—usually snowy—city without my husband, my right-hand-man, there to make sure nothing absurd, dangerous or embarrassing happened to me? Did she forget for a second that I’m in a wheelchair now? Continue reading “What I Learned During My First Solo Travel Adventure in a Wheelchair”
It frightens me to say that I’m excited for 2019. It scares me to say that 2018 has been good to me and that I’m looking forward to what 2019 has in store. Why does it scare me? Why does the admission make me want to take cover? Because I’ve felt this way at the year’s transition before—settled, happy, optimistic—and it didn’t turn out the way I had hoped. You see the last time I put my faith into a new year, it was 2016. And 2016 let me down—2016 left me paralyzed. So I am skeptical. Continue reading “Going Wheels First into 2019”
I said I would kill myself when I turned 55. Continue reading “Do I Really Want to Age with a Spinal Cord Injury?”
Today, December 3, is International Day of Persons with Disabilities. The theme for 2018 is about empowering people with disabilities and ensuring inclusiveness and equality. It’s a tall order for just one day. I’ve been somewhat privileged since my injury to be in a bubble of inclusiveness. I’m surrounded by family and friends who make it a priority to include me. I have a husband who does everything in his power to make sure I experience all that I can. I have this blog that is followed by people who take an interest in disability, accessibility and equality. But lately I am seeing through my bubble. I am noticing how foreign disability still is to so many who don’t have personal experience with it. I am noticing how quickly my concerns are ignored and how accessibility issues are disregarded. I am noticing how much work still needs to be done. Continue reading “A Bad Advocate With Good Intentions”
Have you ever cried after sex? How about in the middle of it – bringing the entire sweaty, messy thing to a crashing halt? I cried last night. It wasn’t the first time – I’m sure it won’t be the last – but it was the first time in a long time and it caught me off guard. Sex after spinal cord injury isn’t something I’ve talked a lot about. I’m not sure why, as it seems I’ve talked about everything else. But for those of you hoping this is some sort of paraplegic’s guide to sex, I’m sorry to disappoint – may your Google search take you to a different corner of the internet. This is a little about sex, a little about loss, a little about adapting and, quite simply, another little piece of my story. Continue reading “Sex Postponed Due to Tears – Try Again Later”
It’s 10 AM and I have yet to eat anything besides Halloween candy. I haven’t showered and the ridiculous night sweats I recently developed makes this all the more problematic. Last night’s episode (along with the sports bra I wore to bed) left my skin a lovely shade of hot pink – and yet I still haven’t showered. And the last thing I have time for right now is writing. So why am I here? I’m here because tomorrow we are leaving for Hawaii and while I was extremely nervous to book this trip when it was proposed a year ago, the changes in me since that time (especially over the last few months) have recently stood out to me and I wanted to share. Continue reading “When Surviving Becomes Living”
I want my body back.
This is all I can think about as I blink back tears in the dark and quiet of the night. I always feel a pang of guilt for admitting it out loud. But I need to take a moment and allow this longing for my old self without shame. Continue reading “I Want My Body Back”
I’m just waiting for someone.
I was only gone for five minutes.
I’ll move if somebody comes who needs it.
These are just a few of the excuses used to justify illegally parking in a handicapped parking spot. Out of all the things I expected to struggle with when I was told I would never walk again, parking my car was not one of them. And yet, here I am. And I am frustrated. I am frustrated with the lack of accessible parking and with the people who don’t think they are causing a problem by abusing the spots that exist. I am tired of people using tags that don’t belong to them, tags that are expired or no tag at all. I’m not a confrontational person and I do like to give people the benefit of the doubt by thinking that they are unaware of how crucial these spots are for the people that need them. So here is my attempt at spreading some awareness. Continue reading “Accessible Parking – Necessity Not Convenience”
I had my period the day of my accident. I remember laying in the trauma room asking little to no questions about my injury but telling every single nurse who would listen that I had a tampon in. I didn’t stop until I was sure they had taken it out – it seemed unnecessary to add toxic shock syndrome to my list of current complications. Looking back, it was probably one small thing I felt I had control over. But, as all women know, we don’t really have control over our periods. Continue reading “Periods, Birth Control and Spinal Cord Injury”